Missing the Point

There was once a man who walked into a shul. He didn’t have any background in Judaism; in fact he had never even contemplated the thought of doing anything Jewish. But he decides to try it one day and goes to Shul on Yom Kippur. He sees the masses of people, anticipates what could be so interesting and walks into the main hall, sees a friend and says hello, when suddenly – “STOP, how dare you! You can’t talk during the Amidah!” The man realises that this is not a place where he wants to be and promptly walks out, back to his everyday existence. He eventually marries and has children, who don’t even know they are Jewish. Fifty years later, he has many grandchildren, some of whom aren’t even halachically Jewish anymore – but no-one knows or cares.

What’s more important? Preventing one person from talking during the Amidah or a potential lifetime of involvement in Judaism plus the added benefit of keeping generations of Jews within the fold?

If there is one principle that underlies Judaism, it is Achdut – unity between all Jews. You can look frum, talk frum, daven frum but if you have just ONE broygus with any Jew, you still have work to do.

This time of the year is very appropriate for working on this particular issue. The mitzvot of Purim and Pesach are geared towards bringing Jews closer together: Mishloach Manot, Seder night with the family and tzedaka at both Purim & Pesach. The stories of Purim and Pesach both discuss the transformation from a group of individuals to a Jewish nation. We start the special 4 Parshiot which occur in Adar and Nisan with Parshat Shekalim, where we record the half shekel that every Jew had to donate – not a whole shekel, to show that no-one is more important than anyone else – we are only a half, we need others to make us whole.

Our challenge then is to think about what we say and always be welcoming at all times. As representatives of the Jewish people, we have the ability to enthuse the man in the above story with how amazingly rich Jewish life is – or we can criticise him for a ‘crime’ that he didn’t even know was wrong. We have the power to change lives in major ways. All we need is a little perspective…



As a postscript, I should add that I know at least two families who were nearly scared away from Orthodox shuls: one because they were told off for not keeping Shabbat; the other because someone was rude to them in Shul. B’H, both those families didn’t leave and have contributed so much to Jewish life; made up thousands of minyanim; educated adults and children alike in the love of Torah; set up Jewish continuity organisations; given Shabbat hospitality; the list is endless. The sad fact is, that for these two families that stayed, there are probably twenty that didn’t. It’s our responsibility to change that for the future.